So went to get a blood test and see the doc today. Poor guy... He made room in his schedule just to see me and tell me that everything is really as it should (according to my bloods) and that it's probably all due to my anxiety issues. You have got to be kidding me. Seriously, all this crazy is because i feel, um.... CRAZY?
I know it sounds weird but i was hoping there was some other reasonable medical explanation for all this instead of me being anxious and needy. I was hoping there was something that i could take a magic pill or shot and it would fix itself up. To know that it's just me being full of anxiety is a bit funny to me because, really, i'm usually so in control. This is not like me. It is not rational. It is not right. It downright pisses me off!
But it is the way it is. And the day was somewhat the same. After feeling so fab last night and most of the morning (hullo placebo about seeing the doctor), I had my usual crazies throughout the day and really, i'm over it. They say it could be my body getting used to lower blood sugar levels. Probably right, though i've been at it 3 weeks now and not much has changed. I'm an addict. To sugar. Hi addict, can you believe it. I almost lost it when darling husband refused to share a sip. Just one sip of his coca-cola. What the hell! So not fair.
But life's not fair. Thank God that it's not alot worse for me because, even though this seems like the worst. It could still be worst. And i should be grateful. As i was last night. Grateful that i have people who love me. And the best friends in the world. Ones who will take my darling child off my hands for hours on end just to help me out. And family. Loving, fabulous family who would drop everything just to be with me and help me through this.
But you know, i'm still a little pissed off. I'm just going to be! Hopefully soon i can let it go and get on with living.
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